Sweet & Sour. "Oh, you mean Sweet and BLOODY SOUR!!!"

So, with all my earlier ranting about not ever doing City lunch again, I went back to my usual but this time it's a place call 'Tomodachi'. I have had their beef in black bean sauce with Jasmine rice and thought it was great so there I was being stuck on it for the week. I went in today to pick up my usual and found that some other pathetic lunchers have tasted the goody in the pudding and made a mad rush for it leaving me with nothing! Well, I have to make a new choice in order to save me from starvation and I know that my colleagues would not be looking forward to my rusty mood if I don't eat today. I'm like that you see, whenever I don't have lunch, I become touche, so much so that I could tell my boss to shove it where the sun don't shine and if you know my boss well, you will know that this is not a woman to mess with. Chinese women don't take SHIT!!! But, she's usually accomodating during my lack of sugar season; she understands not to mess with a 'Gidi chick' at such times!

So, the other obvious choice was 'Chili Beef'. Now, from that name, would you have expected anything in the region of Sour? I think not! I opened my bowl and I was pleasantly glad to find that I could at least count 10 pieces of beef rashers which of course my tummy or is it my taste buds found welcoming until...sting! sting!! oh my! What is this? The beef was covered int the tangiest, sourest pineapple pineapple juice with whatever else they put in it. I was so hungry that I was basically asking my brain to please be more tolerant and down this food but no! My teeth refused too. I know I should visit my dentist at some 3 or 6 months interval but my dentist face scares me and the fact that i'd have to have some sharp object scouring my mouth isn't my idea of fun. Everytime I receive that notice saying "Dear Ms A...do you know it's been 6 months since your last dental check..." I have a fit and quickly chuck the paper in the bin. I can't stand this but I can see that it's time to pay for my disobedience. My teeth ached! It was like drinking battery water (whatever that tastes like). I looked for water on my desk and realised that hunger no even let me remember to get water from kishen! "Oh, good!" I thought, try this Starbucks Toffee nut Latte, this should help and my God! It tasted like Grapefruit with Sour whatever! Yuck! See me see wahala! That is another 4 quid gone down the drain. I lamented and settled for my Marks & Spencer extremely chocoloatey Mini bites. Ah! Iya n je yan ni city o.

Anyway, you know how I like to dey over step my boundry now? My office was in Liverpool street but recently, my department moved to another office which is very close to Bank (the underground station). For those of you who are familiar with this area, you will know that I tell no lie when I say that this place is full of designer shops from GUCCI to LOUISE VUITTON and the rest and me, being a sucker for handbags, couldn't resist popping into one of them today. I tip-toed, chested out, held my own bag out like wetin! I was doing my posh walk. Shey you know those silly shop assistant know how to assess you from top to bottom, check to see say you be the type wen dem fit say "hello madam, can I help". In a few seconds one came to me and asked just that to which I gave her my plastic smile and said i'll beckon on her if I do. She repayed me with her plastic smile also and everything was dandy. I sashayed to the display and picked up one gorgeous beige bag from their collection and tried it on my shoulder. It looked DI-VI-NE! "I like this", I thought to myself. I looked for the price and couldn't find the tag, then I looked inside and suddenly, my arm felt heavy! I think i'm gonna have a fit! The slow motion I used in returning the bag to the shelf was something else. I immediately gathered myself to leave the shop and then this stupid shop assistant re-appeared, "Madam,it's only £2,500 (imagine! Even Hermes one sef, I no think say cost reach that level), can I have it wrapped for you"? Felt like i've never heard that word before; only! I shot her a "if you don't get out of my way this instant, i'll bring out my 'omoriodo' and kick your head in" and replied,"No, not today, I have something similar at home which I bought from this very store some months back" I bet she was going to reply and say they never had something similar but I didn't even allow her open her mouth before I made that quick dash for the door! Yawa! I stepped out and caught my breath. I see Karen Millen, let's see what their price is saying today, phew!

You Have The Right To Remain Silent For Anything You Say Could/Would Be Used Against You!

Okay, i'm begining to think this anonymous thing is bullshit and I have a good mind to start posting my pictures on here now to take away all doubt that I am who I am. I remember Temmy mentioning that she had an encounter with someone she probably knows coming to reveal her identity on blogville by writing out her full names. I thought that was silly and evasive. Surely, if Temmy wanted her Identity to be known, she would have gladly put it up for the world to see.

I have to be honest though, when I started blogging, I didn't think too much about the internet thing, I just saw it as a page, a page where I can cough out, you know, say what I am feeling at particular times but as time goes on, i've been made aware of the transparency of this whole ish. What spurred this on?

Well, I just got off the phone to a friend who managed to find my blog. That is no big deal you'll say, but after speaking to him, I realised that this is probably not one of those people I want to be reading my blog. In a sense, a blog is like keeping a personal journal which really should be meant for your eyes only but when it's done on the world wide web, it takes away those rights and that I know. Don't get me wrong, this person i'm talking about is not a bad person or anything but speaking to him about my blog made me realise that i'm perhaps not ready for this. I want to be able to share certain information and keep some but maybe not anymore.

Hairdresser Alert!!!

Hey Londoners! How's y'all? Listen, does anyone know of a good hairdresser that can sort me out with the "baddest" single plaits in town? I'm thinking of Feathers or pick and drop. Holla atcha gyal plois!

Taink Yous.

The First Date???

I just got back in from outside where it's pissing down with rain. Imagine a bonafide chikito venturing out into the showers without her 'brolly'? It's unheard of! We all know about the infamous British weather and if there's anything you should know about this Kingdom, it should be the weather - for it's unpredictability. It is almost unheard of for a lady not to carry a brolly in her handbag, it is a prerequisite which must be written at the back of every lady's palm. Well, I broke the rule today which needless to say that I paid for it not so dearly.

I haven't been to work in 2 days -well, I had to pull a sickie on Monday morning all thanks to my favourite radio dj - Neil Fox who kept on going on about the horrendous weather and how Central line and Circle line wasn't running due to one lame reason or the other. Okay, you all know that I had no business pulling that as an excuse as i'm a diligent bus rider abi? Well, the guy kept on going on about how if he was me (or any other listener), he'll stay that extra 2 mins in bed. I could only take his advise but what a shame! My 2 mins turned into 30 and 31,32...well, you all know how hard it is to get out of bed in winter so don't even front abeg! I looked to my side and saw the telephone. I made use of it and called my boss...

Boss: Hello,
Me: Hello Barbara, it's me..
Boss: Oh! How are you?
Me: Not very well, I was on my way to work this morning when I slipped as I was about to board the bus and I think I might have sprained my ankle
Boss: Aww...sorry to hear that; why not take some time off, call someone to take you to the hospital and take it easy.
Me: I will do just that; sorry I can't...(she cut's in)
Boss: ...don't be silly! It could be serious. Take time and come in when you're well.
Me: Thanks. I'll come in as soon as I can. Bye...(hangs up).

Yeah, yeah! You expect me to feel ashamed of myself? Whatever! I afterall didn't complain when she picked up her Louis Vuitton luggage and trotted of to Hong Kong on holiday for the whole of 2 weeks lumbering me with some mad work! It's only fair that I get some rest too right? only fair.

Mr. Pro and I have been getting on quite well of recent. Well, our first date was really good but to be honest, it wasn't a defining date though. As in, I didn't leave thinking yeah! He seems do-able. I just felt, so so. The restaurant was a Nigerian one; well we decided on that so as to feel at home, make it relaxed one. I wouldn't normally opt for a Naija restaurant as you know how that can be; it's usually filled to the brim with those fraudsters discussing business, arching their next big credit card scam and sorts. I hate it! I loathe them! I abhor those guys and have not an iota of respect for them. However, my acceptance to do Naija was for the restaurant. 805, isn't so bad. It has that nice cosmopolitan feel to it that makes you lose mind of it been a Naija restaurant (afterall they serve Naija dishes).

Mr. Pro was scheduled to pick me up at 8pm and guess what, he arrived exactly on time! Me? I was still caking my face up with face mask and fiddling with my makeup bag to find the perfect colour when my phone went! Tralalalala(that's my T-mobile ringtone, i'm not one of you suckers for Beyonce's 'de'ja vu' ringtone or is it Awilo Logomba's, i'm a good old fashioned English...erm, Nigerian girl.). "Hello..."(I answered reluctantly). "Hi, i'm outside" he said. "what!" was my reply. "No, don't tell me you're typically being Naija by doing the African thing on me" he said. I replied: " But, you're early" Him: "We agreed, 8pm" Me: "Yeah, but...but...okay, give me 5mins please". Him: "I'll be waiting". Argghhh!!! The only time you will ever catch me being on time is for a client meeting! Well, 15mins later, I managed to pull it off and was I looking fa-bu-lous or what?! Yes, I do say so myself! (come to think of it, someone has been drinking too much of her own akpeteshi lately and if I may add, she's freaging high on it!)

I got to the car, a nice German machine. Hm...me likes(come on Dessy, stop being so materialistic). Anyway, he didn't come round to my side of the car to hold the door open, I was so hoping he would but then again, good thing he didn't. I like genuine people. I mean, what's the point of holding the door now when you know you wouldn't be doing it later?. I slid into the car. He said hello and gave me a peck on the cheeks and complimented saying I looked beautiful...yeah, yeah...heard it all before but thanks for the compliment.

We stepped into the restaurant which was virtually packed and come and see oju! Naija babes, why una too dey hate? See looks o, like say na dem bobo I steal! I know I look fabulous but excuse me, I didn't come to be the feasted upon, I myself came to feast (on jollof rice and fried fish that is!) Oh, by the way, while I was all decked up in my purple dress with stilletto gold shoes and my purple satin clutch looking every inch a babe, Mr. Pro was casually cladded in his jeans and a simple cotton shirt. I felt so over-dressed! Was I thinking this was a date and him thinking it's a casual night out for a drink? Oh well, we're here now. The conversation was good. We talked, laughed, talked about ambitions, aspirations, current affairs, Naija and all sorts. It was a successful evening. I tried to be a lady and only killed half a bottle of wine. I wasn't talking too much, I behaved. Thank goodness it wasn't white wine though cos God knows I would have been blabbing about my first kiss, my ex boyfriend and what colour undies i'm wearing. Phew! Glad we behaved.

We finished our meal and the waiter brought the bill over. I reached for my clutch to reach for a couple of notes and Mr. Pro held my hand and said. "Pls, don't, I'll be offended if you do". I looked up and laughed and said, "you'll be lucky!, I was only reaching to get some mint". We both bursted out laughing...

He dropped me off outside my house. I didn't ask him in for a cuppa or nothing. He didn't attempt kissing me either. It was a good night, I had a good time, I hope we would do this again soon, he said. I agreed and alighted from his car. He was off to Brazil the following day. As I went up to my house, I thought...Hmm...i'm not exactly swept off my feet. We'll wait and see.

He sends me an e-mail a week later saying...

********************************************

Ohhhh....church was really fun yesterday. It was African and Caribbean Praise day and we had Sam Okposo, a number of Naija gospel artist and some from the Caribbean too. I did think of decking my iro and buba complete with damask gele and ikpele for efizzy but when I peeped outside my window, I thought "perhaps not". As usual, it was pouring and not the best day to hop out of bed and jump hooray! I't's gonna be a fab day today. I changed my mind quickly and decided on the wooly turtle necked dress I finally succumb to buying from Gap and to go with it was fish net tights and my Knee high boots garnished with tassles that didn't do nothing but sat looking pretty on the sides. Alright, I have to confess, I really shouldn't have driven to church yesterday as i'm yet to tax my car since it ran out some 15 days ago. I did get it Mot'd but by the time I finished at the test centre, it was gone past 1.30pm and those of you in the United States of the Queen knows that those yeye post offices pack their baggage and leave at 1.00pm to get their greasy fish and chips...pshew! I couldn't have missed African Praise for nothing seeing that I had practised my Makossa steps I was going to use to dabaru their heads at church. I know it's bad o (just in case some ITK comes in here washing their mouth on me o), but I couldn't not see Sammy Okposo. I had to go to church!

I got to church and narrowly got a space to park in the parking lot. I was chuffed! Alright, so I get to the church ground and the 'onibodes (ushers)' were redirecting people to the overflow. Iro o, it can't be! But i'm on time now? Ah! Naija people, una too like 'faaji'! Because it's about dancing and praises, trust Naija to be on time, but if it had been fasting and prayer now, they wouldn't have showed face o. Okay, I went into the overflow and sat down. Omo, I didn't even hear a beat before I started dancing! O ga o. There was this artificial oyinbo woman who did dress well but come and see drawing on her face! Her eyeliner seemed to be heading to Timbuktu and her lipstick couldn't have been redder! The looks on the childrens faces were priceless. Everytime this woman danced toward them to pick them up they would run! It was so funny. And there was another one who sat before me that you would from her 'esho' know that this one prefers Liverpool street jeweleries to Italian gold or Dubai's -that's all i'll say. Anyway sha o, Sammy came up and yes, he does know how to rock the crowd but the bit where he said everybody "scream" threw me. I thought, okay, am I in Ibiza or TJ's? This is a church and not a club n'tori oloun! He wasn't exactly on point either ojare but i'll soon be writing about my opinion on the 21st century end time churches.

Anyway, hope you all had a good weekend? I sure did!

No darling, I think You've Lost Your Marbles!!!

Hahahahaha...some Nigerians can be so funny or is it just plain annoying? There is this particular bus driver that totally gets up my nose with her attitude and everytime my bus pull up at the stop and I see her face, I always get the feeling that i've been let down yet again by the Transport for London. This said bus driver is a woman and Nigerian. She is the kind that sits up ready for action everytime she opens her doors to allow commuters in. I have never seen anyone take so much pleasure in checking passes. She would find her spectacles, wear them and lean so close to her glass to see your pass. I have noticed also that she pays less attention to your pass if you're white but as soon as she sees a black person, she takes on a totally strange persona. God help you if you're one of those who would get on the bus and flash your pass briefly because this woman would order you to come back (I have a feeling she must have worked in the Nigerian army) and paste your pass on the clear glass for her to see. Imagine how embarrasing this can be in a packed bus full of white people going, hmm...there goes another black fare evader. This woman did that to me once.

So, this morning, I boarded the bus as normal without looking at the destination (I assumed it should stop at Liverpool street station anyway as it usually terminates at Shoreditch) but not sooner had we stopped at London Bridge Station, that the driver flashed his lights warning that this was the last stop. I wasn't very pleased as I was only going to be on time by a few seconds. I kissed my teeth in the Naija fashionable manner and alighted. As soon as I did, I looked up, and there was another bus - "good!" I said to myself, at least I won't have to wait for eternity to get to work. The bus stopped and the driver refused to open the doors to let passengers in. We were all confused. "open the door!" the other passengers shouted but no, she wouldn't budge. It was her! The Iron lady of the London buses! "It's gonna be a good day afterall", I thought. This woman wouldn't even allow passengers alight all because she didn't want us to go in through that door! She is mad! I thought. At last she did let us in and then went into this mad rage. "This is my bus (in her thick Nigerian accent of course), I decide who comes in and who doesn't" You should have seen how everyone decended on her. It was hilarious but embarrasing for me being a Nigerian. There was this Carribean woman that really dug into her and gave a good tongue lashing but knowing this psycho driver, those words didn't ruffle her feathers at all. She is mad!

I took a seat and it was a racket in the bus. People couldn't stop talking about her nasty attitude and most people had a story to tell about their encounter with this psycho of a woman. Interestingly, most people who had something to say were blacks. I guess she must have tried for yonks to get into the country that when she eventually did, she couldn't contain her joy or pride to be working in Queens own country. You never know, she might be gunning for an honourable title for the Best London bus driver of all time abi? I bet she has her dress picked out for that special title to be bestowed upon her by the Queen of England. This is a woman on a mission, i tell you

My Day Out With The Diva And Her EntouRAGE!

Okay, would it sound cheesy or cliche if I said I missed each and everyone of you? No? Good! I really did miss you but never mind, I think i'm back now, for a longer period. I did wonder around blogs though. I'm sure you came accross some of my comments on other blogs and wondered why this girl never updates hers. Well, aside the fact that I have been busy, I did warn you of my 'olesness' (come back here! That word is not in the dictionary, it's among my endless list of 'Dessy's coined words'). Yes, I make up my own words as I go and who says I can't write my own dictionary eh?

I have been busy trying to put my business together (Yes o! It seems we're finally going to have a lift off in that area of endeavour. Things sure are looking up but i'm not about to let the cat out of the bag just yet - sorry honey. :-)) That aside, yours truly has been having more fun and it looks like babe is looking younger and more fabulous by the day! (Abegi! Let me bask in my own fabulousness, biko nnu!). There are a few gists still in my kitty that I have to get round to posting i.e My birthday suprise party and my subsequent date/s with Mr. Pro (thanks to Bijou for coming up with that name).

Last Saturday was pretty funny. Bunmi decided to treat me to a day out to London Eye at which time, my ever bubbly, ever witty and ever beautiful neice was with me and since she gets on with Bunmi (Not!) like a house on fire, I decided on her coming with us, to which her mum was only ever so obliged to get her lunch pack ready (That woman is a serious "Gbaju e"). Bunmi is very friendly with my aunt so she visits them quite often so I would say that -that has acquired her ample chance to bond with my niece (well, it's only natural that you bond with her because "thou can not get to the mother except through the daughter) and so, previledged to have received her third degree (You wouldn't believe that child is only 5!). Anyhoo, so we set out to Westminster Bridge and you should have seen those two. Bunmi says one thing and my niece comes back with the fiercest retort then Bunmi would turn to me and say "Did you hear what she said"? "Eh-ehn, you hear her now o, by the time I slap her bum, don't talk o" And i'm just looking at her like, goodness me! Olubunmi, you're old enough to have two of her! (Bunmi is 26). They are both really funny! We had loadsa fun on the bridge. Bunmi wanted to take pictures on her digital camera but my niece insisted that she (Bunmi) bought a Barbie disposable one. "Egba mi ke"! Bunmi exclaims, but no o, my niece knows just how to get her way. Bunmi eventually buckled and gave in. Of course, who better take pictures of such memorable day in our lives if not my ever sweet, gentle, not forgeting adorable little neice? Afterall we all know that outings like these are generally geared towards kids so why not let them have truck loads of fun and pamper them a little (yeah, yeah! **rolling my eyes**. If only this one was really as a 5 year old should be, but no, she has to be slightly advanced for her age). Let's just say, when the prints came out, it left you guessing who was who as our heads was no where to be seen in the photos! She was kind enough to leave us the opportunity to guess who's who from the torsos though, which is rather generous of her if you ask me. Needless to say that hers came out picture perfect as it was either me or Bunmi taking her pictures which she was only happy to share with tourists and statues. This child looked every inch adorable. But of course she is! Just that something about her never fails to remind me of Angelica from the rug rats cartoon series.

We didn't get onto the London Eye's capsule as Bunmi just didn't think it made sense for us to be in a capsule that didn't do anything other than moved round slowly for a painstaking 30 mins. She decided it should be London's Aquarium for us. I was so hoping that my neice would protest but I guess there is something more going between those two because she was only too happy to see the fishes too. I was outnumbered. You're probably if I was actually physically present there? well, I was. I just didn't have any energy to argue with a little 5 year old bully or a spastic 26 year old (I love her really). I unwillingly obliged. Bunmi is such a perfect host though, she paid for all the rides, the train fares and arcade games. I was well equipped with cash o but my friend insisted (common! i'm not that of an Ijebu really. I did offer to pay!). Anywyay we went into the Aquarium thingy or whatchamacallit? I was hoping to see big sharks, sea horses, Dolphins and what - nots but what did we see? Tilapia, Mackerel, 'panla' and the likes! Okay, maybe we did see a teeny-weeny shark but it was nothing to go "WHOA!!!" at. I was absolutely gutted to say the least. Everyone else seemed to be having fun but me. I just didn't get it! I mean, I would gladly sit in my friends house and watch his turtles and gold fish swim away in his humoungous fish tank than be here! At this point, my heart was longing for that London Eye capsule. I wish I didn't come with these two spoil sports!!!

Oh! Did I mention that we went to the arcade? Yeah! My niece hates crazy frog and everytime that ring tone came up on telly, she would cry! Literally rolling on the floor. So, it was her chance to get back at the frog. In the arcade, they had a game where you use a sorta hammer to knock down the crazy fogs head and you should have seen this child. She totally went for the crazy fogs head and the look on her face? Priceless! Bunmi wondered if we should have her exorcised after that becuase boy! She looked posessed and if she could get extra strength she would have shattered those poor frogs head indeed!

Some hours later, they decided they'd had enough and I was finally put out of my misery. Phew! Glad that was over! We can now go home! Oluwa Seun! Have I ever been so glad? I wondered.

?******?******?******?******?******?*****?*****?


By the way, isn't it just funny? As I laid in bed this morning listening to some soothing music on Magic 105.4fm, and in the news was the story of a British Airways employee... or so, who was told to take off here crucifix pendant whilst at work. She sued but lost the case blah, blah, blah as the judge said they would not allow religious blah blah at work and yet in the same breath, the broadcaster talked about christmas and when the xmas lights would be switched on! Isn't that such an irony? For a country that doesn't tolerate religion any longer, they still see christmas as okay? Apparently, they no longer see it as the birth of christ but just another festive period. Hmm...I guess someone has forgotten that christmas should indeed be about christ? The same man who was crucified and who perhaps is the reason why the BA employee wore a crucifix? I don't get it.

***********************************************

Did someone say that Temmy got her blog back? Wow! Let's say "Al -amdullahi" and "Praise the Lord" for his goodness! It would have been such a shame to loose all those juizy stories of hers o.

**********************************************
One more thing y'all, if you would be in Nigeria sometime next year and during election, I implore you to please go out and vote DONALD DUKE in please! I think he really would turn that country around and give us youths the voice we've so been yearning for. You know that majority of Nigeria population are young? We have the power, so please let's us it! Say No! To Nigeria recycling it's leaders!!!
***********************************************

Anyhoo, i'm off to meet Mr. Pro tonight, we're going to some restaurant/bar somewhere in Greenwich. I should be out about 8pm or so. Gist boku insai 10 kobo book o. You gasto know! I'll see you soon!

I really like these songs and hope you do too...

I was WASABI' ED

No, is this meant to be a joke or what? It's not the 1st of April, now is it? Whoever did this should know i'm not laughing at all! I was looking forward to 1pm so as to rush out off the office to get me some Wasabi( a japanese take out on Old Bond Street). You could only envisage my delight when that clock struck 1. It's not like I couldn't have gone earlier but my brain has been wired in such a way that if I went to lunch earlier, I would feel like the time is dragging when I get back to the office but at 1 -1.30ish, I won't return into the office until about 2.45 or so, so by the time I actually get back to doing anything, it will be getting closer to home time. I don't do no extra hour for no jack Robinson. Say who die! I do work late sometimes though but believe me, the whole office will know when I do.

Anyway, the gist of my story is that I asked for plain rice with Chicken Teriyaki. I got to the office only to discover that I had been served beef with a lot of onions and peppers! "This isn't what I asked for" was my exclamation, but you do know what the Yorubas say about hunger? Well, they say " Ebi o ki n w'onu, ki nkan imi wo" meaning...get a Yoruba dictionary jo! I'm not in the mood for translation. Seeing that I have to settle for what I had at the mo, I tucked in. Infact, I forgot to bless the food - that is how hungry I was. It was then then that I noticed that I could actually count the numbers of beef there was in the freaging sauce! My! I was LIVID!!! I didn't pay some 5 odd quid for this! I have had it with City lunching! Tomorrow, i'm bringing in Amala with Ewedu and Gbegiri sauce! I don't give a ratz azz what they all think in the office, they better get used to it cos i'm no longer gonna be shedding good money for some nonsensical portion of food! I know you guys are probably thinking, this Iya Ijebu abi? Well, I am Ijebu o and a proud one at that!

********************************
Kids Do Say The Most Amazing Things...

By the way, I had the opportunity of taking my niece to school this morning. Well, after her mum crashed on my side last night without prior notice with an excuse that it's sunday and my niece was missing her favourite aunty, I was lumbered with cooking and being the perfect host to a demanding mum and her insatiable daughter. After they'd had my 'Asaro elemi mefa (well, I forgot to add dried stockfish to it), my aunty decided that it was too late to drive home (home is just 5 mins away o)she and her cheeky rugrat crashed at mine for the night. I didn't have to be told that I had the responsibility of taking her to school this morning. You know it's winter now and how hard it can be to get out of bed. My niece was up before anyone else and left her mother to enjoy her sleep o and came over to my room. She wants me to bath her and take her to school! No! I was wondering why they were still here anyway as I expected my aunty to have woken up earlier to go home and get my niece ready for school. I told my niece I couldn't take her to school as we would have to go to hers to pick the School Uniform up. She didn't let me finish my sentence before she went to the other room and picked up her backpack! So...this aunty had it all planned out the night before!

So we got ready and I could hear my aunty still snoring away. I will get her, in due course - I thought to myself. We set off (my niece and I). As we got to the car park, she headed for my car. I was like, she must be joking! I told her we were taking the bus to which she replied No. I said well, I take the bus to work and she replied but mummy takes me to school in the car! O tan! There is no way i'm driving her to school only to come back home, park the car and head to the bus stop! I persuaded her that it would be fun and betterstill, she will get to sit on the top deck, well, that seemed to have done the trick.

We headed to the bus stop and she wouldn't stop talking. I thought i'd play a trick on her so whilst still walking along the road, I looked back and shouted! The bus is here expecting her to make a dash for the bus stop to wave the bus to a stop but she didn't flinch! I said, didn't you hear me? She said yes I did. I said, but you didn't run. She said, because I know it's not the bus. I said, how did you know? she said...Because i'm Smart, beautiful and black! Whattttt! That shut me up!